The Holiday Wrecking Ball

Obligations, guilt, and tradition are the hallmark of many holiday celebrations. How to look at the upside.

Holidays can crash the wrecking ball in on what people try to keep intact the rest of the year. An, “I don’t care” attitude about disconnections from family members. An, “It doesn’t bother me,” attitude about loved ones who are deceased.  In reality, it impacts people deep. Probably deeper than they even know.

Holidays can offer a real mirror into how alone people really are. Dinners with limited participants. Few, if any, gifts. And an overall feeling of just going through the motions.

Why do we do this to ourselves? It’s in the name of tradition, darn it! Tradition of what?  In remembrance of your parents and your grandparents being miserable with their own relatives? Fun!

There can be such pressure for people to do what they don’t want to do for the sake of others who are probably feeling similarly to you. Why spend time with people you spend the whole year trying to avoid at a time toted as being “the best time of the year?” Oh right, tradition.

How about making your own tradition? Spending time with people you really love. Doing good deeds for others. Attending a service or festivity. Reading a book. Doing something that brings the real sense of spirit into your heart. Now that sounds more like it.

I know there are just some things and people you cannot get away from. Well, maybe you really could but tradition and guilt and obligation are all tied, so there you are sipping some eggnog. But maybe the way you think about it could be shifted.

When we think we are going to dread something, we generally do. When we think an experience is going to be awful, it generally is to some degree. What if you take the glass is half full approach to whatever it is you are doing this holiday?

Try these on for size:

1. I am so glad I get to eat a home cooked meal.

2. While I wasn’t happy to see everyone, I am so glad I got to see my cousin Trevor.

3. I love Aunt Tammie’s special hot cocoa.

4. I am blessed for how I live my life.

5. I am a patient person.

Happy Holidays to each of you. Thank you for reading my stuff throughout the year. In an effort to have the glass half full, I am blessed!


I can feel positive during the holidays no matter my obligations.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

Active Thinker January 07, 2013 at 06:20 PM
Powerful positive thoughts make us really thankful for what we do have and what makes us happy. The holidays have different meanings to many people...sometimes it seems others express frustration if you don't share the same values...so this is a nice reminder of any event in life we are all different. Be happy for others who express joy and maybe a hand when they are not...


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